134 days, part I

I’ve been wanting to read the whole Bible, from beginning to end, for a few years now. But to be honest it was kind of an intimidating commitment, so I just stuck to things like six-week studies instead. But over this past Christmas break I decided I was finally going to read from Genesis to Revelation. I looked into different reading plans, most of which were to be completed within a year. I thought about doing one of those, but that plan quickly died…

I started reading Genesis on January 7^th. And just finished it two days ago on May 24^th.  If it took me almost five months to read one book, just 50 chapters, then reading the whole Bible in a year seems a little too ambitious. I don’t know how long it will take me. Probably a few years. Certainly not just one.

Five months is a long time. Through wrapping up college with my last semester, pursuing Young Life International staff, deciding to move to Germany, starting the fundraising process for staff, continuing to invest in my relationships with friends and family, and reading through Genesis, I’ve learned a lot over these last five months. I’ll talk about just one take-away right now. More to come in later posts.

But first… Here’s the thing about the Old Testament… I find it very frustrating and confusing. Most of the time I just really don’t get it. But it is also incredibly rich and fascinating. Perhaps that’s why I’ve spent so much time in just one of its books.

I would read one little verse, get stuck, and remain there for a week, sometimes two. I knew I was on the verge of “getting” whatever it was God was trying to teach me. It was frustrating at times knowing that this particular verse stood out to me... But why? Sometimes I didn’t get the answer for a few weeks. Or I’m still waiting for the answer.

Other times I would read three chapters in one day and feel like I got nothing out of it. Equally frustrating.

And still other times I would get just plain mad. I read just the first verse of Genesis 12 when I was still a little apprehensive about Young Life International staff and where I would end up.

The LORD had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people, and your father’s household to the land I will show you.”

Not funny, God. Not funny. But more on that in my next post.

Okay, so here’s my first take-away from the last five months: Everyone in Genesis has to wait forever for everything. At least that’s what it seems like anyway. And learning how to wait is important. Not just idly waiting. But actively waiting. Patiently waiting. Much of life will be spent waiting. For a job, a raise, a promotion, a baby, a spouse, Spring Break, the weekend, happy hour, and whatever else. There’s always going to be something that’s next that we’re holding out for. And learning to wait well is important because it’s in those waiting periods that God does a lot of good work in us.

But waiting is hard for me. More and more I find myself loving change, so I’m always looking forward to the next thing. The next adventure. The next stage of life. And right now the next thing is Germany and all that that entails. But Germany is seven months away. Of course seven months is nothing compared to the 25 years that Abraham and Sarah had to wait for the baby that God had promised them. But seven months feels like freaking forever to me. But I’m learning that God does a lot of good things during the waiting periods, and He wants me to walk in that. To think ahead to the future with wisdom and shrewdness, yes. But to live in the present and stop wishing time away.

Because the reality is that Germany is not my present. Fundraising is.

I know that fundraising is an extremely important and biblical step in going on staff with Young Life International. I’ve spent the last few weeks grounded in scripture and preparing for it with my fundraising coach because it’s a big, intimidating number I have to raise before I can move. I’m getting more and more excited about fundraising as God changes my perspective on it. But if I’m not disciplined in my thoughts every day, it’s easy to look at it as an impossible goal or something that is standing in my way and holding me back from the ultimate goal: Actually moving. But that’s incorrect thinking. Fundraising over these next seven months is part of the ultimate goal. Not something holding me back. And it’s important that I walk in that with confidence. It’s important that I live in that and experience all that God has for me during this “waiting” period.

It took me 134 days to read Genesis. Through studying scripture and dealing with daily relationships and circumstances, God has taught me a lot in the past 134 days. Even when I don’t understand what I’m reading or what He’s doing or what I’m doing… I can trust Him because He is good, He is sovereign, and He loves me. I have to constantly remind myself of those three truths. He has changed and transformed my heart in more ways than one over the last 134 days. And while I will try to take them one day at a time and live in the present, I look forward to all that He has for me over the next 134 days.